by Omar on 06/18/2014

I’m sorry I have to say it but you look like you’re sad
Your smile is gone; I’ve noticed it bad
The cure is if you let in just a little more love
I promise you this, a little’s enough

Angels and Airwaves – A little’s enough.

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Happy Birthday Z

by Omar on 06/11/2014

Today would of been Z’s 7th birthday.

After I was reminded, I remembered why I know. It was because Kasha though it was the 6h of November but it was a misreading of the American way or writing the date – 11/6/2013.

I am reminded of how clearly I can still imagine her. Her voice, our arguments of American vs British English. “Sorry, I don’t speak American. What do you mean, you want an eraser.” Her confidence and kindness. How when I wrote about her how it felt like she was in our class for so much longer then the short time we were lucky enough to know her.

Happy Birthday Zara x

From the assembly we had.

Zara made lots of friends at our school both in our class as well at other classes. Anyone who got to meet her would quickly see why. She was a happy girl who was always smiling and having fun.
Because I was one of her teachers it always made me happy when she would put her hand up to share what she was thinking. I was always impressed with how well she worked; whether on her own or with others. I always smiled when I saw her being kind to someone or when she was helping someone.
But the thing I loved most about Zara was that it felt like she had always been a member of our class and a part of our school. Our school were lucky to have such a kind, generous, fun girl even if it was only for a short time. We will all miss her lots and are sending our thoughts and prayers to her mum and dad and all her friends and family.
Mr Chotoye

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Where did you go?

by Omar on 05/2/2014

In no particular order…

    the weekend
    Lyra’s visa/flights/visit to the UK
    My move to Chongqing – packing up and going and all that entails
    the gym tonight
    lunch

I’m there. Somewhere else.

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by Omar on 05/2/2014

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by Omar on 04/29/2014

The world stretches away in a blur of things that need doing. I can’t imagine it’s just a teacher thing. You’re walking up that hill and what looks like the peak isn’t, nor is the next supposed peak. Maybe I should realise that I’m never going to get there?

Isn’t that just the hardest thing though. To accept this moment as being the peak!

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How?

by Omar on 04/28/2014

How do you cope? Just, with everything? How do you get by? How do you feel? How do you feel about, some of, your decisions? How’s life for you? Filled with something? Love? Regret? Anxiety? Fear? All of the above? Is that ok, for you? Or not? Do you wish it was different? Just a little maybe? What could, should you do to make that happen?

Right this second.

Is life enough for you?

(I should write more. I should write less. I should do more. I should do less. I should be happier. I should be fitter. I should be less scared, anxious, fearful. I should realise this is enough. I should never think that.)

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by Omar on 03/7/2014

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by Omar on 02/26/2014

And everything can be a sign if you let it. If you want it to be.

A sign to let things go. A sign to hold on to things. A sign to forgive, to show kindness, to love.

To let go of the anger and frustration we let bubble up to easily. To hold onto those most important to us, to realise who they are too.

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by Omar on 02/14/2014

“Every year my life feels a little more frenzied. From the minute my alarm clock rings, I’m off to the gym, the office, the store; then home to feed the cat, cook dinner, read the newspaper, pay bills, write in my journal, watch the news, brush my teeth, and fall into bed. I can no longer sit still without feeling guilty. But at the laundromat, I can sit still. I’m not doing nothing. I’m doing my laundry.”
Luci Yamamoto,

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Winter

by Omar on 01/28/2014

Winter

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by Omar on 12/8/2013

This last week has felt like there’s simply been a tension running through me that I am unable to relax. I know precisely it’s causes, it’s all the things I’ve got running through my head. How I can’t seem to let them go for long. I can. I did yesterday but I can feel it building again. It sometimes feels like a natural state. As we try to balance our lives out.

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by Omar on 12/2/2013

This is the picture that the parents of the girl in my class who died gave me when I met them on Friday.

IMG_20131202_165930This is a picture of one of the orphans we visited on Saturday.

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All I know, is these things have given me plenty to think about.

What’s important? What isn’t?

I mean really.

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by Omar on 11/14/2013

Have been taking some time to try and put some words down this week. I guess it’s like old times. Some of them I’m happy with, others not so much. Some I’ve worked on and others are the result of turning my 5 minute sand timer over.

colours are ours alone,
our shades, simply pulsing neurons.
and our words are not our feelings
our feelings are not our words.

the wave has passed
leaving only uneven waters
a boat cast adrift

Z
and so
she’s conspicuous
by her absence
we feel the
hole she has left
we feel our own
lives, sharply
we said we wouldn’t,
but we lose ourselves once more
And we forget
how we said we wouldn’t.

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Sweet potato mash

by Omar on 10/28/2013

Ingredients

1 sweet potato
some onion
some garlic
some coriander
some salt
some butter
a mashing thing
etc

1. peel, chop, boil potato in salted water
2. cook garlic and onion over a low heat
3. blend garlic and onion
4. mash potato roughly with some butter
5. add garlic and onion and salt to taste good
6. add coriander

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by Omar on 10/23/2013

Do you have patience to wait till your mud settles and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving till the right action arises by itself?

Lao Tzu.

Sometimes, during the best thing for me to do is to be still.

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by Omar on 10/22/2013

a moment where the thing that changes is your perspective

yet, that moment changes the world

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by Omar on 10/21/2013

Untitled

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by Omar on 10/16/2013

It’s amazing how easily fear binds, isn’t it?

And how easily we let it.

Let it subdue us to shells of what we know we can be.

But. Also. How easily we can free ourselves.

Just by starting.

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by Omar on 10/13/2013

Untitled

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by Omar on 10/11/2013

“Let go of everything. Not only of the things that you couldn’t do, but also of the things that you could. Let go, and make room for new and better things to come. Namaste.”

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