But it is actually the small moments in which we see ourselves fully and truly this way. The small moments define ourselves, reveal ourselves, paint us true and right. It’s in the moment right before the big decision, in the unplanned reflex, the bracing before impact, when our arms go out instinctively to save the person next to us . . . and leave our own body without defense. Or maybe we only save ourselves. Either way, our nature is revealed. This is when we learn who we are, for good or for bad, for richer or for poorer. But always, for better or for worse, because we are, after all, married to ourselves.