Today in Chinese crisp flavours: creme brûlée and milk tea!

Exercise today was row 5k. Which I do because I know it’s good for me, even if I’m not a huge fan. Either of cardio or rowing.

Youngest didn’t wake until 5am so Lyra and I got the bed to ourself all night. Then the eldest and I moved to the spare room at 5:30. Was led with her in the dark, listening to the rain and it was lovely.

#ifthisisn’tnice

Made lasagne for tomorrow. Did some exercise. Was productive. Felt good.

Shoutout to the Wayback Machine for saving the lasagne recipe I like to use after it disappeared

Yumo moved out of our room and into his sister’s. The first night we gave it up but they both eventually slept and then slept through most of the night.

It meant I was able to lie in bed and read a book before going to sleep!

IKEA

This letter to an ‘agony aunt’ from someone who has lived in their partner’s home country for a long time and now misses the country they are from is something I think about a lot. Where is my home? I don’t know that I could easily answer that question.

The originally makes sense apparently but the English trans unit so much.

Is there a way to block websites in Safari on my iPhone? I’ve deleted apps but can’t be trusted not to open the website. Eventually I know I’ll just download the apps again because why not.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence my anxiety kicked in after I felt good about myself for doing something. Come on brain, teamwork!

I’ve managed to remove a notification I’ve had for months and never been able to. So I’m feeling pretty good.

Today, try to hold some of the dark and some of the light side by side. Don’t turn away from either one. That’s the muscle I’m building in these horrible, beautiful times.

Courtney Martin

Youngest did not sleep well and was slow getting back to sleep. So now I’m off to work and feeling a little* tired.

*A lot, a lot tired.

New plan: Have something to do in the evening.

I find I come home from work and spend time with the kids and eventually get them to bed and then I have time. The thing I want most in the whole world, beyond a home gym and a British supermarket.

Yet, I inevitably waste it with idle browsing, being annoyed or stressed or anxious, some of this and some of that. Then suddenly it’s late and I really should be in bed and I’m feeling no better for the time.

So new plan is to have a plan in the evening. Monday was go to the gym, which was awesome and then. Yesterday Lyra and I started watching Monsters and Love - which is fine if the voiceovers are a bit much.

I think I just need to be specific. Using the time to go through my RSS feeds or even catching up on some YouTube videos is fine. There just needs to be purpose.

lessons

stand up for what is right
prioritize your mental health
being flexible brings success
your voice makes a diffeerence
do not hide from your emotions
hard moments do not last forever
healing yourself makes life better
pursue your goals no matter what
embracing change eases your mind

young pueblo

via

My favourite thing about iOS 14 is definitely the photo widget. A constant stream of photos of the kids when they were little-er is just THE EFFIN’ BEST. Today it brought me to a 1 Second Everyday I did of Elise when Yumo was born and it was so so so lovely to see.

I think there’s something wrong. with my. spacebar as it keeps adding i n adding in spaces and. additional full stops. (periods). Urgh.

In other related news about my kids. Things they’ve been competitive about recently…

  1. Going to the toilet on their own
  2. Eating a healthy dinner

So awful! 🤣

This evening Matthew I’m going to be the father from the Lego Movie…

“Stoooppp messing with my stuffff!”🎵

Another rollercoaster weekend is over… We’ve talked about watching Monsters and Love but we’ll see. My money is on no.

Losing my patience.

Losing my patience with my children is the worst and yet still, it happens.

This week has been difficult because when Lyra and I lose our patience with the kids it affects our relationship as well. Particularly, talking about it between us. We both now we made a mistake but discussing it without it feeling like we’re criticising each other is really hard.

With that said. We’ve talked about stepping in when the other person is on the edge and realising when you are and asking the other person to step in in the future. We’ll see how it goes.

My additional bonus difficulty is that the reasons I lose my patience are basically the same when I’m at work (as a teacher of small children). Trying to maintain calm and reasonable-ness from 7:45am until 8-9pm is difficult. And yes I should be kinds to myself about this but I’m only human, so I’m not.

Listening to Jocelyn K. Glei’s podcast Hurry Slowly and this week it’s titled The Angst of Working from home (WFH). As a teacher, I’m much happier working from school just because of my job needs.

Today I’m grateful that kids here can have parties again. Reminded recently that Elise’s 3rd birthday was entirely at home.

I think that I’ve put the old iPad one of the kid’s uses in a safe place. Thing is, it’s such a safe place I can’t find it.